You have got to quit obsessing about your weight. Chances are your man is not even going to notice your weight unless ‘you’ bring it up. Men don’t care. They look at the whole package. It’s all about how you carry yourself….your ‘aura‘…and how you ‘stage’ your little gold mine. Real beauty comes from within. Your aura is the energy you give off with your body language. Your personality, emotions, and life experiences all combine to give off an energy that is easily picked up by the men you meet. The way you walk, talk, laugh, even cry are all part of what makes up your aura. Do you come off like a ‘lady’ or a ‘tramp‘? Are you ‘classy’ or ‘trashy’? Your aura is way more important than ten or twenty extra pounds. If you give off a good aura and you ‘stage’ your little gold mine you will get some serious bids. Queen Latifah is a Covergirl and her little gold mine is very valuable.
I used to stage open houses to help them sell. The first thing I would do is strip them down. All the knick-knacks and personal baggage like pictures of family, toys, and clutter were packed up and put in a closet. Then I would ‘clean’ the house from the inside out. I might even re-arrange the furniture…take some pieces out. I would put a fruit bowl on the table, light some candles and put on soft music. Fifteen minutes before the clients were due I would put a loaf of bread in the oven. Staging works beotch. If you are properly ‘staged’, your man will not even notice that extra ten pounds you picked up over the holidays.
When it comes down to it you need to keep your weight at a ‘healthy’ level…not too big and not too small. Nobody wants a partner that looks like Star Jones before the surgery…it’s ‘unhealthy’…and nobody wants a bag of bones, but there is a whole lot of wiggle room. Find a weight that is realistic for your body type and allow yourself ten pounds in either direction. It’s all about what makes ‘you’ happy and what makes ‘you’ feel good about yourself. Maybe you need to quit making excuses not to eat right and exercise. It’s not rocket science. It’s not about the newest fad diet. It’s about eating a balanced diet of ‘fresh’ food and ‘portion’ control. It’s a ‘lifestyle’. Men respect a woman who has her weight under control. You can do it girlfriend. It just takes a little effort.
Nothing will put pressure on your relationship like you obsessing about your weight, and by the way, you can seriously put your health in jeopardy trying to keep up with fashion trends. You need to ignore magazine ads that depict women as stick figures and anorexic actresses on the red carpet. Don’t buy products from companies who ‘airbrush’ their models. It’s part of the reason ya’ll have so many hang-ups.
A well balanced diet includes plenty of fruits and veggies, chicken and fish, occasional red meat and something sweet now and then. Avoid snacking late at night and have a good breakfast. Limit bread and pasta. Above all else…stay hydrated.
Food is a drug beotch and you can get addicted to it. Learn to cook. That way you can control what goes ‘into’ your food and your portions. If you are always eating in restaurants chances are you’re not eating the right things. Besides, they ‘supersize’ everything. These days restaurants serve enough food in one meal to feed two people. That way they can charge you more. Never feel obligated to clean your plate. Eat until you’re full. Never starve and never binge. Eat six small meals a day instead of three heavy meals. Quit eating at least 3 three hours before bedtime unless it’s a light snack. Take your little gold mine for a walk after dinner, or a bike ride, anything to burn a few calories and help digestion. Good sex burns calories.
Never ask a man “Do these jeans make my butt look big?” First of all, it’s not a fair question and second of all, it might draw attention to your big fat ass. Don’t make your man feel responsible for your weight issues. That is something you own girlfriend. It is all yours.
If you’re not feeling good about yourself, if you are not feeling sexy, if you are self- conscious and insecure about your weight…get over it…and then do something about it. Whatever your size, learn to love yourself. Don’t burden others with your weight issues and no matter how big you get, don’t let yourself go. You can still be sexy and put together, you can still smell good, wear nice clothes and do your nails. There is something very attractive about large women who have their shit together. NeNe Leakes is a big woman and she is rockin’ her new look. Now she just needs to work on her aura.
The bottom line is this beotch…you need to eat like a fuckin’ lady and girlfriend, if your man is constantly talking about your weight and putting you down, you need to find yourself a new man.